your best pick up lines

viva hate - 3-21-2005 at 03:21 AM

at the bar the other night, my homeboy went up to this broad wearing glasses and said, "you look like a librarian....my books are waaaaaaay overdue."

and he actually went home with her. maybe it was the timing, but i almost pissed myself that shit was so funny. anyone else got good ones?

Dave - 3-21-2005 at 09:05 AM

Brian you might as well say your space pants one.

ENDERA.x - 3-21-2005 at 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by viva hate
at the bar the other night, my homeboy went up to this broad wearing glasses and said, "you look like a librarian....my books are waaaaaaay overdue."

and he actually went home with her. maybe it was the timing, but i almost pissed myself that shit was so funny. anyone else got good ones?

hahaha!!!

GabeTexasGAMC - 3-21-2005 at 02:37 PM

hahahha.. im so lame at this shit...
Hi, wanna do it.
Thats it.
It never works, but i never learn.

Lazy Nathan - 3-21-2005 at 02:46 PM

walk up to a girl, before you say anything just look at her, then look down at your crotch, then back up at her. Then you wait for a second and say, "Well it's not going to suck itself."

ENDERA.x - 3-21-2005 at 07:05 PM

hahahaha shit those last two posts are just great.

too bad they would never work.

BDx13 - 3-22-2005 at 12:47 AM

i never really had a line when i was single. i just had to rely on my consistently good humor. now that i'm married, i just straight up tell girls that i'm married, but i think that they look hot.

"listen, i'm a married man, so this comment isn't meant to go anywhere, but i think you are a very attractive woman."

my wife just laughs.

TTF - 3-22-2005 at 03:53 AM

I vacuumed out the trunk for you...

crazyfists28 - 3-22-2005 at 04:56 PM

i'll give a dane cook (comedian) line here, go up to a girl who might be sitting by herself and say, "hey, are you going to walk to your car by yourself later? I'll be over here watching you ALL NIGHT!!!

ENDERA.x - 3-22-2005 at 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Big Duane
i never really had a line when i was single. i just had to rely on my consistently good humor. now that i'm married, i just straight up tell girls that i'm married, but i think that they look hot.

"listen, i'm a married man, so this comment isn't meant to go anywhere, but i think you are a very attractive woman."

my wife just laughs.

way to go!
haa amazing

moron - 3-22-2005 at 06:14 PM

I cant say Ive ever used a pickup line.

Unbound - 3-23-2005 at 04:27 AM

duane, you must have married an angel, if my wife heard me say that she would have me hog tied and thrown in the river before the last word even came out.

Scott Kills - 3-23-2005 at 07:46 AM

"So, you wanna fuck or should I apalogize"?

BDx13 - 3-23-2005 at 09:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Unbound
duane, you must have married an angel, if my wife heard me say that she would have me hog tied and thrown in the river before the last word even came out.

she also tends to point out large breasts or hard nipples or shit like that as we're walking down the street. [begin wife's wisper voice]"look at the size of the rack on this woman on your right!"[end wife's wisper voice] so yeah, she's pretty funny like that. she knows she's got me, and nothin' gonna happen, so there's no worry.

Jeff trhe Greek - 3-23-2005 at 09:41 AM

This isn't really a pick up line.....
Crowded bar, you ask a girl to dance, she says no...you say....
"No, I said you look fat in those pants."

RomanticViolence - 3-23-2005 at 01:49 PM

Nice shoes... wanna fuck?

clevohardcore - 3-23-2005 at 04:45 PM

"that skirt would look great if they were on my bedroom floor."

ENDERA.x - 3-23-2005 at 06:51 PM

>>> Oh how I wish you were like my bowling ball. (she should look confused, and then say..) So you could be fingered three times, wind up in the gutter, but keep coming back for more.

ENDERA.x - 3-23-2005 at 06:52 PM

tisk .

BDx13 - 3-23-2005 at 07:00 PM

i like that shirt, it really fits.
but most of all, i like those... SHOES!

Discipline - 3-23-2005 at 07:09 PM

From the classic film Suburbia:

Skinhead-"I wanna fuck your brains out."
Girl -"What"
Skinhead-"I said I wanna fuck your brains out, but it looks like somebody already beat me to it."

Discipline - 3-23-2005 at 07:16 PM

My friend liked to use fucked up lines on women just to see the reaction he would get.

"You're so hot I'd eat the peanuts outta your shit"

"You're so hot that I'd swim through a river of shit to suck the cock that fucked you last if it meant a chance at a night with you."

"Wow, you're cute. I like 'em fat so your just perfect for me. Overachiever in that category aren't you girl."

He had others but I can't remember any.

clevohardcore - 3-23-2005 at 08:08 PM

damn. thats fucked up.

ENDERA.x - 3-23-2005 at 08:10 PM

HAHAH

GabeTexasGAMC - 3-23-2005 at 11:40 PM

what the hell did kylie say... id drag my dick through a mile of broken glass to eat the peanuts out your shit or some shit like that.

cool as aids - 3-24-2005 at 07:03 AM

Kylie ain't sayin much right now; he's passed out like a lightweight on my living room floor

ENDERA.x - 4-1-2005 at 08:59 PM

You must be a parking ticket. Cuz you got fine written all over you!

moforn - 4-2-2005 at 04:07 AM

so... playin' pool are ya? (inside joke, dave used to say that all the time).