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Author: Subject: Funniest site I've read in a long time
BDx13
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[*] posted on 6-11-2005 at 12:03 AM
Funniest site I've read in a long time


"Katie Holmes vagina must be like a magical box of wishes, cause Tom Cruise has lost his fuckin mind. I?m sure he could probably act more bat-shit crazy that he has been, but I?ll be dammed if I can think of how."
- http://www.thesuperficial.com

This site is a little slow, but it has some of the funniest entertainment and celebrity commentary I have ever read. And I don't even like celebrity and entertainment commentary.





If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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[*] posted on 6-11-2005 at 12:11 AM


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Strippers are good for many things. Many many many things. Many many many many many things. But generally not as a character witness in a sex-related trial. Being referred to as the best behaved client at a strip club is like being referred to as the most-huggable Kodiak bear. I support girls being anything they want to be, especially if they want to be skinny bi-sexual whores, but I?m not sure if I?m a big champion of them being the deciding factor in whether or not I do jail time.





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[*] posted on 6-11-2005 at 07:58 PM


site is pretty funny



\"thank you very little\"
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[*] posted on 6-15-2005 at 11:54 PM


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Scarlett Johansson needs to think harder
Permalink | Monday - June 13, 2005
According to a story on Glamour UK, ?Scarlett Johansson says her ultimate fantasy would be having sex in the back seat of a car ? ?I do think having sex in a car is sexy. If I were in a really raunchy frame of mind and thinking of doing something crazy and kinky and sexy, the back seat would be it.?

I haven?t gotten around to having sex with Scarlett Johansson yet, I?ve been pretty busy, but I?ve always assumed it was gonna be pretty hot. Now I?m not so sure. Scarlett needs to get a computer, cause the back-seat fantasy died in the 1950?s once people figured out what porn was and it was only exciting in the first place cause drive-in movies led you to believe you might get attacked by a monster. If her ultimate deviant fantasy is sex in the back seat, I might bring a magazine or something cause I?m gonna get pretty bored pretty fast. Unless the back seat is filled with 10 other models and a saddle and some cowgirl hats. And a little something called the ?Mr. T Power Fist.? Although I?m gonna need a AC outlet and a surge suppressor for that one.





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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 01:04 AM


hahaha good stuff! duane.. how do you find this shit?



Have you ever noticed how crayons are a lot like M&M's? All the colors tend to taste the same.
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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 08:52 AM


i don't spend much time "surfin' the net", but i have a lot of goofy friends that are always emailing me shit. some of it i check out, some of it i post up here. i have been reading thesuperficial somewhat regularly since i discovered it, though.




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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 10:28 AM


That site is pretty funny. That Lohan chick is fucking hot.
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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 10:38 AM


^^ correction. that lohan chick WAS fucking hot. now, as the author suggests, she looks like a "crack addicted skeleton". too bad about that healthy chest she had.




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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 10:39 AM


Quote:
Jack White secretly married Karen Elson yesterday in Brazil after a five week romance with the model. A lot of people are speculating this is all some lame publicity stunt, but I'm a firm believer that you can find love in only five weeks. Wait, did I say "love"? I meant sex. Anal sex. With prostitutes.

From Thailand.




hahahahaha




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[*] posted on 6-16-2005 at 11:35 PM


Cruise lost his mind when he became a scinetologist...that is one fucked up cult....they beleive all humans used to be gods and we locked away our powers. TO get them back we have to cleanse our souls and become scientologists. To get powers back you basiccally give cash to the organization.



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the murders, the terror
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but now the victims, they\'re rising
their numbers\'s multiplying
they want their revenge for the years
that they\'ve been dying
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[*] posted on 7-8-2005 at 12:21 AM


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Paris Hilton is delusional
Tuesday - July 05, 2005
According to Hello magazine, Paris Hilton wants to host her wedding ceremony in London at St Paul's Cathedral, Westminster Abbey or Windsor Castle, and sees no reason why the royal family shouldn't let her except for the fact that only British royals or heads of state can marry in the historical venues.

"I'm the closest thing to American royalty anyway," she said. Hilton has written to Prince Charles, begging for permission to hold her dream day at one of the venues."

Somebody should explain to Paris that walking around Los Angeles in a tiara doesn't automatically make you royalty. In fact, wearing a fake crown and pretending you're a princess actually makes you the opposite of royalty. And I'm not sure what the opposite of royalty is, but I believe it's something along the lines of a walking vagina shaped like a mantis.





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[*] posted on 7-8-2005 at 02:21 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by BIG DUANE
Quote:

Paris Hilton is delusional
Tuesday - July 05, 2005
According to Hello magazine, Paris Hilton wants to host her wedding ceremony in London at St Paul's Cathedral, Westminster Abbey or Windsor Castle, and sees no reason why the royal family shouldn't let her except for the fact that only British royals or heads of state can marry in the historical venues.

"I'm the closest thing to American royalty anyway," she said. Hilton has written to Prince Charles, begging for permission to hold her dream day at one of the venues."

Somebody should explain to Paris that walking around Los Angeles in a tiara doesn't automatically make you royalty. In fact, wearing a fake crown and pretending you're a princess actually makes you the opposite of royalty. And I'm not sure what the opposite of royalty is, but I believe it's something along the lines of a walking vagina shaped like a mantis.


That bitch is looney




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[*] posted on 7-8-2005 at 03:28 PM


I fucking hate that Hilton cunt so fucking much that words can't describe. She and all those like her need to be fucking killed. Seriously. I would love to see her die a painful death and then go take a giant smelly beer shit on her fucking grave. People like her are a good example of what's wrong with the world today.



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