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Murk
Posting Freak
Posts: 1243
Registered: 5-15-2005
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i'm on nothing, but have considered the option.
i definitely have my ups and downs, but reading this thread has me a bit spooked.
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Furly
Posting Freak
Posts: 1324
Registered: 1-7-2008
Location: right next door to hell
Member Is Offline
Mood: Not your band.
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| Quote: | Originally posted by BD
furly, i love you.
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Six66Mike
Posting Freak
Posts: 3090
Registered: 11-20-2003
Location: Queensland Australia
Member Is Offline
Mood: Dead Hearts
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Seems I'm with the minority group here, no meds.
A lot of people ask me what kind of music I like. I love "soul music". My "soul music" isn’t a style, genre or niche. It’s music that is genuine. It’s
a painful lyric, a dirty bassline, it’s a harrowing vocal, it’s feedback, it’s an anthem, it’s a love song, it’s anarchy. I’ve got my personal
favourites but in the end it doesn’t matter who or where it comes from... so long as it’s good and it's real.
- Paul Morris, music director at 97.7 HTZ-FM
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
Posts: 12937
Registered: 9-19-2004
Member Is Offline
Mood: Sick Of It All, Youth Of Today
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I don't take shit. Probalby should have, but never have. All I know is that life is tough for everyone this day in age. Honestly, it is really hard to
be happy. But when it happens you do everything you can to never let it go or at the very least remember it.
Even though life is really fucking hard and a downer, it is there for you to live it. It is what it is and it is there for you to make what you can
with it. I aint preaching at all and I aint nobody important, all I am only saying is what I tell myself sometimes. Don't give up. All you guys and
gals are good peoples.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
Posts: 12937
Registered: 9-19-2004
Member Is Offline
Mood: Sick Of It All, Youth Of Today
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Watch FLETCH or FLETCH LIVES. You'll feel better.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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Discipline
* DRUNKEN MONKEY *
Posts: 11900
Registered: 9-8-2004
Location: Over here
Member Is Offline
Mood: The Alley Dukes
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The main reason I stay on the meds is to control my temper. I have severe anger management issues, and some severely violent tendancies. Basically,
the pills keep me from losing it and killing somebody, which keeps me out of jail.
‘Do you know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun. Straight through your heart.’
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tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
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A few years back I was on Celexa (if I remember correctly) and it seemed alright until I had been on it for a while and then had to go without for a
couple weeks. Every day I was off of it my anger got worse and worse until it was a constant rage that had me ready to kill anyone and everyone I came
into contact with. I talked to my doctor and was told that I should stay away from that shit completely and maybe look into something else on down the
road. Part of the reason I was taking the meds to begin with was for anger issues, so to see that come back in an ultra-mega-mutated form just from
being off them again for a short time was pretty fucking scary. I was diagnosed with long term depression with occasional spikes of extreme depression
in conjunction with anger issues on top of an addictive personality when I got on that shit and I had actually gone in to have myself locked up to
keep from killing myself not long before I started seeing that doctor. I'm really really glad that my head had cleared enough by the time I was
screened at the hospital for them to realize I was no longer a threat to myself because I really think being locked up would have been a very bad
thing for me. Anyway, a month or two later I found a very cool doctor who hooked up services on the cheap and was very understanding and helpful for
my situation. She prescribed the meds and like I said, they seemed to work pretty well up until I had to go off them for what was supposed to be a
short time. With that kind of backlash from them I decided it was in the best interest of me and everyone around me to clear that completely out of my
system and I have been much better ever since. Sure, I have the occasional spike of depression or anger, but I've learned to deal with it much better
and haven't ever tried any other meds.
I did really enjoy the sexual side effect of that one because I could go for literally hours before finishing off with a massive explosion that left
me feeling happy for days. My doc said that was the strongest reaction in that particular area that she had ever heard of, but that she thought it was
probably a pretty damn nice addition to the anti-depressant result.
Veritas odium parit
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gavin
Posting Freak
Posts: 3973
Registered: 1-15-2005
Member Is Offline
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| Quote: | Originally posted by clevohardcore
I don't take shit. Probalby should have, but never have. All I know is that life is tough for everyone this day in age. Honestly, it is really hard to
be happy. But when it happens you do everything you can to never let it go or at the very least remember it.
Even though life is really fucking hard and a downer, it is there for you to live it. It is what it is and it is there for you to make what you can
with it. I aint preaching at all and I aint nobody important, all I am only saying is what I tell myself sometimes. Don't give up. All you guys and
gals are good peoples. |
i hear what you're saying here
but.............
being real deal depressed is not something that can be changed by having a better outlook on things
believe me i wish it could
its inbedded in your head
its in your heart and in your guts
you cant think it better
its in some peoples make up
a chemical thing
im one of these people
i wish there was a better way for me to deal with these things because overall im very anti-medication
i take next to nothing other than something for a heaache now and then
im not lashing out at you by any means
im happy for you that you were able to feel better and deal with things in such a positive way
just try to undersatnd some people, myself for one, can not control these things
its a real deal sickness
or so i have heard
you come at the king....you best not miss
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upyerbum
Posting Freak
Posts: 3226
Registered: 10-14-2005
Location: Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
Member Is Offline
Mood: Condemned 84
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| Quote: | Originally posted by MrBadVibes
its a real deal sickness
or so i have heard |
It certainly is. And not to be taken lightly. I actually had a very similiar situation to Saints. I had a very bad experience with the meds I was on.
I quite nearly lost my mind. I actually ended up going to see a psychologist, it was gay as hell, but she helped me out with some good advice, and I
slowly and sometimes painfully made small changes in some of my daily habits, I still struggle, but overall I'm much better. Clinical depression is a
very serious thing, and different things work for different people. I totally understand when you say its in your head and heart, I also totally
understand not wanting to take meds every day. The psychologist route helped me a lot.
Well, its this place where nobody works, and the pigs don\'t give you any shit. Everyone smokes weed and gets drunk all day. Its a place where
cunts like me and you can truly take it easy and relax. Know what I mean?
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MikeFromInhuman
Posting Freak
Posts: 1423
Registered: 4-19-2007
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Member Is Offline
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It just dawned on me that I told a bunch of strangers that I am on medication and have been for years...who says HC isn't family?
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
Posts: 12937
Registered: 9-19-2004
Member Is Offline
Mood: Sick Of It All, Youth Of Today
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| Quote: | Originally posted by MrBadVibes
| Quote: | Originally posted by clevohardcore
I don't take shit. Probalby should have, but never have. All I know is that life is tough for everyone this day in age. Honestly, it is really hard to
be happy. But when it happens you do everything you can to never let it go or at the very least remember it.
Even though life is really fucking hard and a downer, it is there for you to live it. It is what it is and it is there for you to make what you can
with it. I aint preaching at all and I aint nobody important, all I am only saying is what I tell myself sometimes. Don't give up. All you guys and
gals are good peoples. |
i hear what you're saying here
but.............
being real deal depressed is not something that can be changed by having a better outlook on things
believe me i wish it could
its inbedded in your head
its in your heart and in your guts
you cant think it better
its in some peoples make up
a chemical thing
im one of these people
i wish there was a better way for me to deal with these things because overall im very anti-medication
i take next to nothing other than something for a heaache now and then
im not lashing out at you by any means
im happy for you that you were able to feel better and deal with things in such a positive way
just try to undersatnd some people, myself for one, can not control these things
its a real deal sickness
or so i have heard |
^^^^ Dude, its all good. I am not saying I don't have issues because I do and I think everyone does but things effect them differently. I have been
through some bad shit in my life like most have but its all in how you are wired I guess. What I meant to say is don't give up. Do what you got to do.
If meds are it then don't stop. Do whateverit takes to help the fight of living life. Its tough all over and for everyone.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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Discipline
* DRUNKEN MONKEY *
Posts: 11900
Registered: 9-8-2004
Location: Over here
Member Is Offline
Mood: The Alley Dukes
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| Quote: | Originally posted by tireironsaint
A few years back I was on Celexa (if I remember correctly) and it seemed alright until I had been on it for a while and then had to go without for a
couple weeks. Every day I was off of it my anger got worse and worse until it was a constant rage that had me ready to kill anyone and everyone I came
into contact with. I talked to my doctor and was told that I should stay away from that shit completely and maybe look into something else on down the
road. Part of the reason I was taking the meds to begin with was for anger issues, so to see that come back in an ultra-mega-mutated form just from
being off them again for a short time was pretty fucking scary. I was diagnosed with long term depression with occasional spikes of extreme depression
in conjunction with anger issues on top of an addictive personality when I got on that shit and I had actually gone in to have myself locked up to
keep from killing myself not long before I started seeing that doctor. I'm really really glad that my head had cleared enough by the time I was
screened at the hospital for them to realize I was no longer a threat to myself because I really think being locked up would have been a very bad
thing for me. Anyway, a month or two later I found a very cool doctor who hooked up services on the cheap and was very understanding and helpful for
my situation. She prescribed the meds and like I said, they seemed to work pretty well up until I had to go off them for what was supposed to be a
short time. With that kind of backlash from them I decided it was in the best interest of me and everyone around me to clear that completely out of my
system and I have been much better ever since. Sure, I have the occasional spike of depression or anger, but I've learned to deal with it much better
and haven't ever tried any other meds.
I did really enjoy the sexual side effect of that one because I could go for literally hours before finishing off with a massive explosion that left
me feeling happy for days. My doc said that was the strongest reaction in that particular area that she had ever heard of, but that she thought it was
probably a pretty damn nice addition to the anti-depressant result. |
I had the same problem the first time I came off the meds. You're supposed to ween yourself off with lower andlower doses as opposed to stopping cold
turkey. I stopped cold turkey because I was out of money and I went crazy. I would attack people on the street if they looked at me funny or said
something to me. I walked into my doctor's office one day with blood on my hands because I beat up a couple of smartass teenagers in the parking lot
for saying something about the shirt I was wearing. When I explained to my doctor what happened he gave six months worth of free samples to get me
back on as soon as possible. I tried coming off them (properly) another time and was okay for a few months, but then the depression, anger, and
suicidal thoughts came back full strength and I wasn't able to function on a daily basis and was borderline agoraphobic, so my doctor put me back on
them. I still have a lot of problems but the meds take the edge of and help me try to stay level-headed.
The sexual side effects are definitely awesome.
‘Do you know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun. Straight through your heart.’
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tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Discipline
| Quote: | Originally posted by tireironsaint
A few years back I was on Celexa (if I remember correctly) and it seemed alright until I had been on it for a while and then had to go without for a
couple weeks. Every day I was off of it my anger got worse and worse until it was a constant rage that had me ready to kill anyone and everyone I came
into contact with. I talked to my doctor and was told that I should stay away from that shit completely and maybe look into something else on down the
road. Part of the reason I was taking the meds to begin with was for anger issues, so to see that come back in an ultra-mega-mutated form just from
being off them again for a short time was pretty fucking scary. I was diagnosed with long term depression with occasional spikes of extreme depression
in conjunction with anger issues on top of an addictive personality when I got on that shit and I had actually gone in to have myself locked up to
keep from killing myself not long before I started seeing that doctor. I'm really really glad that my head had cleared enough by the time I was
screened at the hospital for them to realize I was no longer a threat to myself because I really think being locked up would have been a very bad
thing for me. Anyway, a month or two later I found a very cool doctor who hooked up services on the cheap and was very understanding and helpful for
my situation. She prescribed the meds and like I said, they seemed to work pretty well up until I had to go off them for what was supposed to be a
short time. With that kind of backlash from them I decided it was in the best interest of me and everyone around me to clear that completely out of my
system and I have been much better ever since. Sure, I have the occasional spike of depression or anger, but I've learned to deal with it much better
and haven't ever tried any other meds.
I did really enjoy the sexual side effect of that one because I could go for literally hours before finishing off with a massive explosion that left
me feeling happy for days. My doc said that was the strongest reaction in that particular area that she had ever heard of, but that she thought it was
probably a pretty damn nice addition to the anti-depressant result. |
I had the same problem the first time I came off the meds. You're supposed to ween yourself off with lower andlower doses as opposed to stopping cold
turkey. I stopped cold turkey because I was out of money and I went crazy. I would attack people on the street if they looked at me funny or said
something to me. I walked into my doctor's office one day with blood on my hands because I beat up a couple of smartass teenagers in the parking lot
for saying something about the shirt I was wearing. When I explained to my doctor what happened he gave six months worth of free samples to get me
back on as soon as possible. I tried coming off them (properly) another time and was okay for a few months, but then the depression, anger, and
suicidal thoughts came back full strength and I wasn't able to function on a daily basis and was borderline agoraphobic, so my doctor put me back on
them. I still have a lot of problems but the meds take the edge of and help me try to stay level-headed.
The sexual side effects are definitely awesome.
|
Yeah, I actually tried to wean myself off of them when that shit happened because I had been told that under
no circumstances should I just go from full strength to nothing, but the effects were still that bad. I can't imagine how much worse it could have
been had I just gone cold turkey. I was literally walking around in my every waking moment totally enraged and seeing everything through that red haze
that comes along with the throbbing blood pounding in my temples when I'm that pissed off. What was really difficult about it for me was that I
somehow didn't even put it together with being off the meds as the cause of it. My thoughts were so clouded by anger that it never even crossed my
mind that it could have anything to do with that.
Veritas odium parit
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Discipline
* DRUNKEN MONKEY *
Posts: 11900
Registered: 9-8-2004
Location: Over here
Member Is Offline
Mood: The Alley Dukes
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Been there and it fucking sucked. Unfortunately I think I'll be stuck on these things forever.
‘Do you know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun. Straight through your heart.’
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BDx13
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| Quote: | Originally posted by MikeFromInhuman
It just dawned on me that I told a bunch of strangers that I am on medication and have been for years...who says HC isn't family?
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hahahaa... shit like that definitely seems to happen on this board.
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
Posts: 12937
Registered: 9-19-2004
Member Is Offline
Mood: Sick Of It All, Youth Of Today
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| Quote: | Originally posted by BD
| Quote: | Originally posted by MikeFromInhuman
It just dawned on me that I told a bunch of strangers that I am on medication and have been for years...who says HC isn't family?
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hahahaa... shit like that definitely seems to happen on this board. |
^^^^^^^ It's all good. This board simply aint typical thats for sure. Thats a good thing.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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upyerbum
Posting Freak
Posts: 3226
Registered: 10-14-2005
Location: Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
Member Is Offline
Mood: Condemned 84
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MrBadVibes, I forgot who I was talkin' to for a minute, and i forgot something that saves my soul everytime I get behind a microphone....start another
band.
Well, its this place where nobody works, and the pigs don\'t give you any shit. Everyone smokes weed and gets drunk all day. Its a place where
cunts like me and you can truly take it easy and relax. Know what I mean?
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morgan
Posting Freak
Posts: 1815
Registered: 7-21-2006
Location: Seguin, TX
Member Is Offline
Mood: neighbors fighting
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I probably should be medicated the fuck out. But on top of being a miserable cunt I'm hard headed as fuck so 9 times out of 10 I won't let myself get
help. I hope you are able to get the help you need Badvibes.
Support the arts, shoot a rapper.
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barc0debaby
Posting Freak
Posts: 2138
Registered: 3-18-2006
Location: My mom's basement
Member Is Offline
Mood: Punk as Fuck
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Effexor turned my mom into an emotionless zombie, but I get her up on that PMA as much as possible. Now if I could only get her to excercise and
start eating healthy.
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joemaconmovies
Posting Freak
Posts: 1827
Registered: 6-22-2005
Location: Western Mass
Member Is Offline
Mood: pissed off
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| Quote: | Originally posted by MikeFromInhuman
It just dawned on me that I told a bunch of strangers that I am on medication and have been for years...who says HC isn't family?
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i rarely tell anyone about this depression and disability shit. if i do, i don't really go into much detail. thanks everyone for your concern. if
you ever wonder why i disappear from this board it's usually due to the depression. the only reason i'm on any medication is to stop my tremors and
so i don't have seizures. i think the depression is mainly from the disability but i think i have some depression issues. weed or booze usually
helps if i'm feeling a little down.
yah, mark, they can't diagnose it. i've had this since like '99 and they are stumped as fuck. my slut of an ex broke up with me for it. it's also
caused anger issues cause i get pissed off a lot and want a change of life but still live at home.
holy shit, i'm telling you all a lot of stuff i try and keep to myself.
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joemaconmovies
Posting Freak
Posts: 1827
Registered: 6-22-2005
Location: Western Mass
Member Is Offline
Mood: pissed off
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actually, another thing that helps block the depression is my doing videos. that usually gets my mind off of it.
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