JULY 12th - 16th...book us,dickbag!!!
WE NEED SHOWS IN THE MIDWEST,PRONTO...WE GOT CINCINATTI FOR THE 1Oth,CHICAGO ON THE 11th,AND KANSAS CITY ON THE 17th...
HELP US FILL THESE DATES IF YOU ACTUALLY CAN DO SOMETHING BESIDES SEND US MESSAGES TELLING US HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO SEE US? REALLY? THEN GET US A
FUCKING SHOW,DICKHEAD!WE HAVE NO ONE WORKING FOR US...NO ONE.
A LOT OF YOU "PROMOTER" TYPES JUST TURN OUT TO BE WHINY HALF-FAGS WITH NO CLUE UNLESS IT'S ON EPITAPH OR WHATEVER BULLSHIT LABEL YOUR WHORE GIRLFRIEND
TELLS YOU HAS THE BEST SPRING ROSTER. FUCK YOU FOR WASTING OUR TIME,OR NOT GETTING BACK TO US. YOU WILL NOT BE FORGOTTEN. KEEP ON BOOKING YOUR
PRECIOUS LOCAL ACTS THAT SUCK THE CALIFAGGIA DICK WHEN IT ROLLS THROUGH ON THE WARPED TOUR. YOU COME SO FUCKING FAR DOING SO.
AS FOR THE REST OF YOU - HELP US OUT.
YOU WANT TO SEE US? GREAT. WE'D LIKE TO SEE YOU,TOO. BUT AS MUCH AS THAT SOUNDS ALL FRIGGIN' EASY,IT AINT. CONTACT US ONLY IF YOU CAN ACTUALLY HELP
FILL THOSE DATES. I DON'T WANNA HEAR HOW MUCH YOU AGREE WITH ME,OR HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE YOU THINK I AM - I DON'T FUCKING CARE. I NEED RESULTS,AND IF
YOU CAN HELP ME GET THEM YOU'RE THE PERSON THAT I WANT TO TALK TO.
GUARANTEES ARE NEGOTIABLE,WE'RE REALLY FRIGGIN' EASY TO DEAL WITH - WHICH IS A HELL OF A LOT MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR THE REST OF YOU
LOT.
AND,BY THE WAY - HEAVY METAL SUCKED THEN,AND IT STILL SUCKS NOW. SLAYER IS FOR PUSSIES LOOKING FOR AN EASY WAY OUT.I HOPE YOU BREAK YOU FUCKING NECK
IN YOUR PRECIOUS MOSH-PIT.
NOW,GET TO WORK.
PAUL
Will learn to Tap Dance,eventually...Will have you broads Hula,definitely...Trust me,you'll see.
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