moron
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I need to make a speech this weekend
Im the best man at my buddy's wedding on Saturday and Im a little nervous Im gonna blank out during the speech or just completely fuck up.
anyone have any tips on good things to say or whatever?
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Thats Life
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just tell embarrassing storys about him then be like i never thought i'd see this day blah blah blah.
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Big Ugly
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I would try to avoid any comments about fucking his mom, sister, grandma, new bride, dog or any others along those lines. This also applies to any
experiences the two of you might have shared with drugs, prostitutes, etc.
Of course if you have a funny story about him being passed out those are always good. For example: I remember when Billy funneled 16 beers and
passed out and we shaved his balls. Ah, good times eh Billy?
Good wholesome anecdotes like that are always good.
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BDx13
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brevity, my friend, brevity.
- introduce yourself to everyone and tell em how you know billy;
- tell the story about billy's shaved nuts for a quick laugh;
- ask everyone to raise their glasses;
- make a sincere statement about your enthuiasm for the bride and groom and their future together (be sure to compliment billy's wife);
- sit your ass down in under four minutes.
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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newbreedbrian
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good advice overall. the only thing you forgot was make sure to wink at billys wife and make a quick blowjob motion. they'll realize youre joking. and
if youre not all that much funnier.
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RomanticViolence
* Jennytailya *
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Big Duane
brevity, my friend, brevity.
- introduce yourself to everyone and tell em how you know billy;
- tell the story about billy's shaved nuts for a quick laugh;
- ask everyone to raise their glasses;
- make a sincere statement about your enthuiasm for the bride and groom and their future together (be sure to compliment billy's wife);
- sit your ass down in under four minutes. |
I agree with duane. Make sure you bring back some pics. i wanna see 
Have you ever noticed how crayons are a lot like M&M's? All the colors tend to taste the same.
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moron
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thanks for the advice. It went well, but like always I turned bright red when I opened my mouth. I kept it brief and I wasnt nervous until I made
the mistake of looking out at everyone staring at me. Then my heart started to race and my hands started shaking. I thought I was going to spill the
champagne, but it all worked out just fine.
...and try as I might, I couldnt get drunk. I had a Tequila Sunrise, a gin and tonic, a long island iced tea and a bottle of red wine but I didnt
even get a buzz. Still, I had an excellent time.
I didnt bring my camera so I dont have any pictures of my own, but Im pretty sure my girlfriend has some. I caught the garder again... my second time
catching it at a wedding this year... and I know she got some pictures of that. I just need to get my scanner working at some point and I can show
that.
here's a little collage from the last wedding though...
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BDx13
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i don't know moron, looks to me like youre having a pretty good time sliding that thing up that girls leg! hope your woman doesnt mind!
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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moron
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oh man. that girl was fucking hot. before I put the garder on her leg the girl's mother threatened me with a bottle of wine. I pointed to my
girlfriend, who thought it was all funny as hell, and said "dont worry. my girlfriend's watching".
Funny thing is that I bought the engagment ring for my girlfriend two weeks after that wedding. I guess it was just kind of fitting that I caught it
again.
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