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sentrand
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serious question here
im not looking for sympathy her. but i kow i will get serious replies. i found out my dad was in the hospital friday afternoon. my stepsister called
to let me know. she said his pacemaker quit and the doctors said he will pass anytime. i was told by her that she will let me know when it happens.
tonight i received a call from an old family friend that was friends with my dad and my mom. he was told by another friend of the family that my dads
wife said that someone else needs to call me because they were not going to. i want to go the viewing but i dont. granted i have only seen hime like 6
times in the last 15 years. before then he lived a half block up the street. he was on good terms with my mom which was his ex wife. he gets remarried
and boom he moves out of state without telling me. he moved two more times after that without telling me. i know this probably desnt make a whole
hell of a lot of sense but.
there will def be animosity because my mom is going as well as my half sister and her family.
i was his only son.
to go or not to go to the viewing and funeral is what i am trying to get an opinion on.
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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DAK
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Sorry about you dad. GO, you'll regret not going in the future. You can't control other peoples opinions just go and take care of your business.
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Vanilla Gorilla
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Sorry to hear that man. Do what is right for you, if it is to go then go. You have as much right as anyone.
Well I've got a feeling I'm gonna get mine in. Retribution let the games begin.
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
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I know you feel you are conflicted on this, but you know what it is you really want to do. This is a difficult decision for sure.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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JawnDiablo
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Sorry to hear this man.
I completely understand that some serious hard feelings from the past are making it difficult to make your mind up.
Having been in a similar situation, I would say go and make your peace for whatever it is worth.
You may end up regretting it if you chose otherwise, and then there's no changing it.
I wish that I had made my peace in some stuff.
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ShawnRefuse
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Sorry to hear about your situation. But no matter how much you dislike his actions of the past, I can tell that you still have feelings there.
Otherwise you wouldn't be asking us. Go if you can. Closure. You can tell him what you want to. It will eat you up if you don't even try.
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BDx13
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sorry to hear this news. the whole situation sounds rough.
to clarify two things...
- your dad's wife said she wasn't going to call to tell you the news?
- the animosity would be because your mom is planning to go to the viewing/funeral, but you were not?
obviously, you have to make the decision hat's best for you. but in my opinion, i'd say go. be the bigger man (no pun intended. ok, pun slightly
intended.), say goodbye and put it all behind you. and if that keeps things positive with you mom and stepsister, all the better.
good luck. our thoughts will be with you and your family.
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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lifeisabitch
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Go
you only get one real chance to to make peace with these things
and regret can last a lifetime
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
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One last thing, if the other family is making things hard, don't let it bother you. Just go and do what you need to do. After its all over, you won't
have to deal with them anymore. Let them make themselves look bad.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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SS76
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Silence is golden but violence is platinum. |
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morgan
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I'd say go.
Support the arts, shoot a rapper.
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sentrand
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Quote: Originally posted by BDx13  | sorry to hear this news. the whole situation sounds rough.
to clarify two things...
- your dad's wife said she wasn't going to call to tell you the news?
that is what i was told by an old family friend of my mom and dad. so far i have not received a call from my stepmother or her daughter. her
daughter told me she would call me when he passed (she called me friday afternoon to tell me he was in the hospital, his pcemaker had stopped and the
doctors said its a matter of time),
- the animosity would be because your mom is planning to go to the viewing/funeral, but you were not?
before my dad married the new wife he live 1/2 block up the street, he and mom got along well. he gets married and they immediately move from ohio
over to kentucky without telling me. he moved two other times without telling me. after getting with this woman he disassociated himself from me and
all his friends.
obviously, you have to make the decision hat's best for you. but in my opinion, i'd say go. be the bigger man (no pun intended. ok, pun slightly
intended.), say goodbye and put it all behind you. and if that keeps things positive with you mom and stepsister, all the better.
good luck. our thoughts will be with you and your family.
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thank you all for the input.i am going to go. but i do have anxiety issues, so we shall see how it goes. three years ago i couldnt even make it into
the same room as my older brothers casket.
and yes i do hold a grudge!!!
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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CR83
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Good decision on your part. If you don't go, you know the outcome. If you do go you at least have a chance of something very positive. Will certainly
keep you in our family's thoughts.
Wishing you the best.
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sentrand
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i drove to find the funeral home then drove to find the church and ended up at the cemetery. it was really spooky seeing his plot. after i got home it
really fucked with my head thinking about just seeing my name on a headstone (minus the jr)
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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Discipline
* DRUNKEN MONKEY *
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Hope you got some sense of closure. For what's it's worth, I think you made the right decision.
‘Do you know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun. Straight through your heart.’
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sentrand
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Mood: hate riot 513,sheer terror, yuppicide, joe coffee
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We will how it goes wed for the viewing. The burial next day.
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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BDx13
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you ever take anything for the anxiety?
despite everything surrounding the situation, i'm sorry to hear of your father's passing. good luck and let us know how it goes.
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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sentrand
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Mood: hate riot 513,sheer terror, yuppicide, joe coffee
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| Quote: Originally posted by BDx13 | you ever take anything for the anxiety?
despite everything surrounding the situation, i'm sorry to hear of your father's passing. good luck and let us know how it goes.
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nothing prescribed. but i am going to be checking into it soon. but i do have a lil something that should help me. yeah ummm.
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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sentrand
Posting Freak
Posts: 1046
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Location: WxSxH, cincinnati
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Mood: hate riot 513,sheer terror, yuppicide, joe coffee
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well it went better than i thought it would. soon as i walked in funeral home the anxiety hit me like a ton of bricks (but not as bad as i though ). i
never did make it in to the casket. i tried, at one point i saw the casket in a mirror and the world just started caving in on me. i was there about
an hour when my step-mother approached me. she looked at me then looked at someone else and asked them if i was bill. (the amount of times that i had
heard that i look just like my dad tonight and always and she says that). that hit me wrong, then she tried to talk to me and she asked so your not
talkng to me. i ssaid no she said something and i said fuck it im out... so i split. my breathing was like i just ran a marathon,
well i shall see how the funeral goes.
this probably desnt make a whole lot of sense...
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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BDx13
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"no, i'm some other six-foot-seven dude that looks like your husband."
don't worry about her.
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
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sentrand
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Hahaha.
Its all over now but the crying. Funeral went pretty good until they played taps!!!!! Pretty much lost it on that. I am his only kid, so think i
should have gotten all his army medals. At least idid get his purple heart!!!!
Oh yeah. He passed on the27th, the day i received the only call from that famjly!
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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sentrand
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Posts: 1046
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Hahaha.
Its all over now but the crying. Funeral went pretty good until they played taps!!!!! Pretty much lost it on that. I am his only kid, so think i
should have gotten all his army medals. At least idid get his purple heart!!!!
Oh yeah. He passed on the27th, the day i received the only call from that famjly!
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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clevohardcore
* Kick\'n ass on the wild side *
Posts: 12937
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Man dude it's good to read that you went and didn't let them take that away from you. It must have been very hard, but your harder bro. Fuck all that
family bullshit.
Each aspect of the soul has it's own part to play, but the ideal is harmonious agreement with reason and control.
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sentrand
Posting Freak
Posts: 1046
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Mood: hate riot 513,sheer terror, yuppicide, joe coffee
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| Quote: Originally posted by clevohardcore | | Man dude it's good to read that you went and didn't let them take that away from you. It must have been very hard, but your harder bro. Fuck all that
family bullshit. |
its over now and i never have to see those people again.
btw, you going to integrity in cleveland in november?
I'm a jerk. All night,I'm seeing Sentrand and thinking "Where do I know that guy from?".
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REV.PAULIE
Senior Member
Posts: 816
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Whereas I'm sorry for your loss...I've been in such a funk,lately,that I'm glad that I didn't see this until now...
I would've suggested showing up in the Elton John/Donald Duck outfit...
I'm glad that you took the high road.
Paulie
Will learn to Tap Dance,eventually...Will have you broads Hula,definitely...Trust me,you'll see.
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