Pages:
1
2 |
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
My FUCKING car
I've been trying to replace my goddamn motherless assraper of an alternator for the past two days now and I'm thinking maybe I should just pour
gasoline all over the fucking thing and let it burn.
|
|
RomanticViolence
* Jennytailya *
Posts: 1547
Registered: 3-26-2004
Location: Baltimore MD
Member Is Offline
Mood: Fuck U All
|
|
Quote: | Originally posted by tireironsaint
I've been trying to replace my of an alternator for the past two days now and I'm thinking maybe I should just pour gasoline all over the fucking
thing and let it burn. |
DAMN IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK HOME WITH EVERYONE AGAIN...Thats all
The Words "goddamn motherless assraper " made everything better this morning!
Have you ever noticed how crayons are a lot like M&M's? All the colors tend to taste the same.
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Always glad to be of assistance
|
|
DAN SMASH
Unregistered
Posts: N/A
Registered: N/A
Member Is Offline
|
|
that's fuck all!
now i am quite partial to the odd foul mouthed obscenity,
but my wife had me totally speechless the other day.
she was looking out of the kitchen window watching our
two dogs turn the back garden into beirut and said
"look at that pair of tossing cuntballs!"
fuck, i never laughed so much!
|
|
BDx13
|
|
i've always found my english friends to be significantly more creative with their use of the c-bomb. thank you, english!
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
|
|
Miss Bitch
* [:VANiTY:] *
Posts: 168
Registered: 2-3-2004
Location: San FranPsycho, California
Member Is Offline
Mood: My brain
|
|
For being someone who is NOT a mechanic, you are doing a great job hun.
.fuck you and all you stand for.
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Thanks Auto Zone, you lying shitfuckers. They had me convinced that I needed something that had nothing to do with what was wrong with my fucking car.
I ended up taking the damn thing to a real mechanic and they tested everything out and my alternator (you know, the motherless assraper?) is fine. I
do have some problems that are being addressed, but that's not one of them. Fortunately, I will be returning the expensive fucking part that I bought
from those shit encrusted cunt monkeys. I say fortunately, because if I cannot return it for some reason, someone is going to die, and that someone
will NOT be me, I guarantee that.
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
OK, nobody had to die, I got my 125 bucks back today before dragging my ass to the office. I am upset that nobody commented on my use of the phrase
"shit encrusted cunt monkeys" in my last post here. I now insist that everyone declare their love for my phrase turning abilities!! OK, maybe not, but
I enjoyed using that one. How about this? FILTH CAKED PUS BUBBLE DRIPPING FROM THE GAPING SORE ON THE HEAD OF A SYPHYLITIC GOAT'S COCK? Does that
work?
|
|
RomanticViolence
* Jennytailya *
Posts: 1547
Registered: 3-26-2004
Location: Baltimore MD
Member Is Offline
Mood: Fuck U All
|
|
Quote: | I am upset that nobody commented on my use of the phrase "shit encrusted cunt monkeys" in my last post here. I now insist that everyone declare their
love for my phrase turning abilities!! OK, maybe not, but I enjoyed using that one. How about this? FILTH CAKED PUS BUBBLE DRIPPING FROM THE GAPING
SORE ON THE HEAD OF A SYPHYLITIC GOAT'S COCK? Does that work? |
It more than "works" thats some good shit there. Im gonna hafta remember that one later when we all go to the beer store. Hell yeah.. beer, fuck books
and FILTH CAKED PUS BUBBLE DRIPPING FROM THE GAPING SORE ON THE HEAD OF A SYPHYLITIC GOAT'S COCK.. GOOD TIMES!!!
Have you ever noticed how crayons are a lot like M&M's? All the colors tend to taste the same.
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Yeah, it's a little wordy and doesn't flow off the tongue as well as some phrases, but it's very versatile and is sure to brighten any office xmas
party!
|
|
BDx13
|
|
"shit encrusted cunt monkeys"
more skillful use of the c-bomb... you sure you're not english?
If I fail math, there goes my chance at a good job and a happy life full of hard work.
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Quote: | Originally posted by Big Duane
"shit encrusted cunt monkeys"
more skillful use of the c-bomb... you sure you're not english? | Oh, most definitely, Texas born and
Scottish blood. No fucking English AT ALL.
|
|
DAN SMASH
Unregistered
Posts: N/A
Registered: N/A
Member Is Offline
|
|
Quote: | Originally posted by tireironsaint
Quote: | Originally posted by Big Duane
"shit encrusted cunt monkeys"
more skillful use of the c-bomb... you sure you're not english? | Oh, most definitely, Texas born and
Scottish blood. No fucking English AT ALL. |
100% english myself, surprise!
that's some serious foul language you got going there tireiron! 11 out of fuckin 10!
i would have congratulated you earlier, but been away this weekend at a "use of the word cunt and it's implications in modern day society's swearing"
conference.
maybe you could be a guest speaker at the next one!
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Thank you, thank you. Yes, I was supposed to speak at this one, but unfortunately the conference was unable to meet my usual speaking fee, so they're
trying to find investors to be able to bring me in next year. See you there?
|
|
DAN SMASH
Unregistered
Posts: N/A
Registered: N/A
Member Is Offline
|
|
yeah, i will be there.
i heard a rumour that (sponsorship pending) they are planning to have you as the main speaker in the auditorium.
i am gonna work all night on my thesis- " The disadvantages of questioning a police officer's parentage whilst under the influence of alcohol". then
maybe i will make the main stage too!
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Nice one, mind sharing that with the rest of the class here when you're done with it? See, unfortunately I can't use drunkeness as an excuse for my
words since I haven't had a drink in many many years, but maybe I can write the counterpart to your thesis, something about pretending to be drunk
after talking smack to cops maybe? Hmm, I think I'll have to put more thought into that, it really doesn't sound that good yet, maybe if I can take a
peek at what you've got it will give me some inspiration.
|
|
DAN SMASH
Unregistered
Posts: N/A
Registered: N/A
Member Is Offline
|
|
Quote: | Originally posted by tireironsaint
Nice one, mind sharing that with the rest of the class here when you're done with it? See, unfortunately I can't use drunkeness as an excuse for my
words since I haven't had a drink in many many years, but maybe I can write the counterpart to your thesis, something about pretending to be drunk
after talking smack to cops maybe? Hmm, I think I'll have to put more thought into that, it really doesn't sound that good yet, maybe if I can take a
peek at what you've got it will give me some inspiration. |
yeah, no probs. i am going to call it "i'm not as thissed as you pink i am, oshifer!". the research has been quite harrowing at times, as i have never
been in that situation myself before, and like your good self, find the sober use of expletives far more rewarding on a personal level. if you would
like to contribute, then may i suggest you conduct a little research with the people who frequent the thorp boards.
perhaps a topic on " top 10 swearwords" may be a good starting point.
|
|
RomanticViolence
* Jennytailya *
Posts: 1547
Registered: 3-26-2004
Location: Baltimore MD
Member Is Offline
Mood: Fuck U All
|
|
This thread had some good shit in it!
Have you ever noticed how crayons are a lot like M&M's? All the colors tend to taste the same.
|
|
JawnDiablo
Posting Freak
Posts: 12139
Registered: 4-21-2005
Location: 1902666
Member Is Offline
|
|
i'm glad i clicked in, theres some awesome new swearing to be learned on here...bravo!
|
|
tireironsaint
* BANNED *
Posts: 4299
Registered: 5-14-2003
Location: Colorado
Member Is Offline
Mood: Beltones
|
|
Ah those memories of a bygone time..... a motherhumping dogsucking asswart of a bygone time.
Veritas odium parit
|
|
moron
Posting Freak
Posts: 2393
Registered: 5-28-2003
Location: CT
Member Is Offline
|
|
my car is being an asshole right now.
|
|
JawnDiablo
Posting Freak
Posts: 12139
Registered: 4-21-2005
Location: 1902666
Member Is Offline
|
|
i made some serious mistakes with my car this weekend...my friend and i installed new struts, and it seemed like everything was going well. i drove it
back from pottstown where we did the job, to UD where I live amd suddenly the hood starts rattling and banging. apparently all was not well and the
strut came through the shock tower and was slamming the hood. luckily the place i take it too for inspection and what not was a few blocks away.
unfortunatly it being saturday at 3pm, all the mechanics had left. so it cant get looked at till tomorrow (tues) i called out of work today and
suppose i will have to tomorrow. i have jury duty wednesday and will call them and try and get out of it....fuck life.
this is what happens when i try and save money by doing the job myself. shit on me
|
|
moron
Posting Freak
Posts: 2393
Registered: 5-28-2003
Location: CT
Member Is Offline
|
|
Ive been thinking of changing my struts. I guess I wont be doing that myself. I was actually gonna give a friend some beer and have him help out.
My car shakes when I hit the brakes. The mechanic said it was the brakes, but he changed them and it's still happening. I think that the refurbished
axle they put in last month shit the bed already and that's the problem, but the mechanic just wont listen to me. So, last monday he turned down the
rotors and replaced the pads. Yesterday he replaced the rotors and pads. I brought it back today saying "See? I told you it wasnt the brakes!"
This dude is costing me money.
|
|
JawnDiablo
Posting Freak
Posts: 12139
Registered: 4-21-2005
Location: 1902666
Member Is Offline
|
|
the struts would have been fine if they came with all the necessary hardware. i thought something was fishy. i talked to the mechanic, who is pretty
cool, and hes like yeah they never come with all the shit. apparently i was missing these rubber bushings which basically keep you from bottoming out.
if i had them, everything would have went perfect. how i managed to drive 50 miles , most of it at 75mph without getting killed or fucking it up is
beyond me.
that sounds like rotors to me too , but then again it could be a bunch of shit..over the years i have had nearly every dumb problem with a car.
|
|
cary thrasher
Junior Member
Posts: 43
Registered: 12-19-2004
Member Is Offline
Mood: watching soia
|
|
that would almost certainly be the brakes. if it were the axle any problems should be more noticable during acceleration than deceleration. i'd make
sure the mechanic test the front AND rear brakes. (this is assuming that you have rotors on the front and drums on the rear) what kind of car is it?
f.u.m.f.
|
|
Pages:
1
2 |